“After 16 months, 7 tries and over $12,000, my perseverance had paid off. I was going to be a mother…”


“I learned more about my anatomy and female processes than I ever expected to while trying to conceive (TTC-ing). I told only a handful of people that I was “trying” and kept all the doctor’s appointments, medications, injections, ultrasounds and devastating test results to myself. I came to realize that there was a title that I was going to wear like a badge of honor – “Single Mother by Choice.” (SMB) It was a hybrid community shoved between those dealing with fertility issues, the LGBT community (in some cases), and other headstrong women who heard their biological clicking way too loudly and didn’t want the time to pass them by. Since I had no documented complications, I was simply doing artificial insemination (AI) as often as my body and my wallet would allow, waiting for my second pink line. For 16 months I rode the fertility roller coaster of keeping the hope up while preparing myself for the worst. Hearing time after time – “everything looks good….your labs, your scans…we don’t know why it’s not working” added to the frustration. I began changing my life – joined exercise groups, changed my diet and even turned to alternative therapies and homeopathic medicine to augment all that the doctors and medications were already doing. After 5 unsuccessful attempts, the doctor said “We either go to IVF (which financially wasn’t an option) or we do surgery to see if there are complications that weren’t there before.” I opted for the next available surgery date in the hopes it would bring answers. When I woke up from the surgery I was finally able to stop blaming myself because they had found two cysts and signs of endometreosis. The surgery corrected them and I was back to trying to conceive again within 2 months. The next attempt failed again but seeing as how it was the first since my issues were “fixed” it hit me harder than all the others combined. Maybe it really was me…maybe I’m not meant to be a mother…were the questions that circled my mind daily. Even people close to me began to ask, “How long are you going to try before you give up?” Although many said it was too soon I tried again on the next available cycle. On the morning of Christmas eve, while visiting my mother for the holidays, I finally got a positive result. After 16 months, 7 tries and over $12,000, my perseverance had paid off. I was going to be a mother.”


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>