“I wasn’t ready to be a mom or an adult…”


“When I first became a mom I was excited and ready to take on the challenge. Little did I know, at only 18, that my whole world would be turned upside down. I started off headstrong thinking I knew it all, which was not the case at all. I worked, took care of my son and before I knew it, because precautions were not taken, I was pregnant again with my second son. That’s when my actual life would be turned into a crazy tail spin of a life. I had really bad PPD with my second son, to the point that I started doing things that I shouldn’t have done. The father of my two oldest children was also in a crazy tail spin that he couldn’t get out of. Needless to say, a few years later I was left to raise them on my own. I did not do very well at being a mother to my two small children. I was in and out of shelters and lived with my younger sister, who always had a good head on her shoulders. She is the reason I still have my children. I was in a VERY bad place mentally. My sister had moved to Georgia and I did the only thing I knew to do and that was to sign custody over to my mom and my sister. I thank god every day they were there to help. I wasn’t ready to be a mom or an adult. They raised them for a year. In that year I came to my senses, somewhat. I knew something had to change. I wanted my babies back. I had no plan of what I needed to do, but since around the time I was left to raise the boys on my own I met my husband. We needed each other, we were both broken and needed that one person that could help us to see our potential. We were that to each other. We were our saving grace. The thing we both craved we found in each other. That’s when both our lives changed forever. We knew we needed help so we decided to leave everything and everyone we knew. He went to South Georgia and I went to Miami. We kept in contact with each other the whole time we were apart, which was 2 years. He stayed in Georgia and I left Miami and moved back home, which was not the best idea. Again I found myself falling back into my old ways and my mom and my sister had my boys once again. Then one day something snapped in my head and I had enough of the pain and hurt that I was causing myself. I sent my husband, who was a friend at the time, a message telling him I was sorry that I didn’t leave with him but now I was ready to give myself to him completely. He came down after work and picked me up. The only thing I took with me was my clothes. I was finally ready for that new start, with the man who has ALWAYS stood by my side. We waited almost six months before we both went to pick up my boys. When we went to get them all kinds of things were going through my head. Was I making the right choice? Were we going to be able to raise them the way they should be raised? The worries every mother has. I was also pregnant with my 3 rd child, my husband’s first. It was a lot to manage and take in such a short time. We got married a few months after we came back with the boys. It was hard at first, but by this point both of us had been through so much that we refused to give up. We moved a few times since we’ve been married and when we moved to Brevard County we loved it here. By this time 3 years had gone by and we were both doing great. The boys were thriving and I was beyond proud of how much we accomplished. Then two years later we found out we were pregnant with our daughter. This pregnancy brought us closer as a family and as Husband and Wife. We are now loving and living life to fullest. We have been together 11 years and married for 7. Looking back I can say that I wouldn’t change a thing because if I did my life wouldn’t be the one I have that I love so much.”


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